Revisiting 16 year old life

We all have heard the phrase "Sweet Sixteen". The phase where you exist your childhood and enter teenage to mould your life into an Adult. Apart from the sweetness, we see a side of confusion, anxiety and anger.  

This also reminds me of a Bollywood song: 

Chocolate, lime juice, ice cream, toffeeya
Pehle jaise abb mere shauk hain kaha
Gudiya khilone meree saheliya
Abb mujhe lagatee hain saree paheliya
Yeh kaun sa mod hai umrr kaa...

In the movie the actress Madhuri Dixit refers this to adulthood and nearing marriage age. But I think, entering teenage makes you feel somewhat same. Your choices and thoughts change. You are  confused about the sudden attention from the society. The sudden mood swings and frequent anger and hyper mood are the signs of this new phase. And then, the line “Yeh kaun sa mod hai umrr kaa...” keeps playing the the background. 

I am revisiting my “sweet 16”, through a letter.


Dear 16 year old me,

I am feeling so happy to write to you. Memories of you are still so fresh in my mind. The 16th Birthday, when you made your first public appearance in a knee length dress. The shy you thought so much even before buying it. But, when the day came and you were being clicked by your elder who complimented without making fun of you. Ahh, that was the moment of change. You suddenly wanted to look good and dress up. 

Remember, how without thinking you take part in your high school elections and won it too. You were high on confidence to try out anything. It felt like you were on Sugar rush. The truth is, you were also loving the new you. Fun in the school bus with your girl gang and those stupid mcdonalds plans. Waking up in the morning to realise you haven't completed your physics journal, made you feel like you would be hanged. You would secretly hoped that the teacher failed to catch her bus and you are saved. 

Seeing you crush would make your day and you had a topic to discuss with your bestie for a week. The pressure of scoring good to impress him was more than scoring for your future. You must admit, you were given so much freedom unlike your others friends. You were not forced into any classes nor asked to wake up at 4.am everyday. To become a doctor or an engineer was not a compulsion. 

Inspite of all understanding you were so concerned about your future. It's was more of confusion, where you dint know what to do in life after completing high school. You selected the subject exactly opposite to what you thought you would always choose. Those last min changes made everyone worry about you. Any new field would attract you. Let me tell a secret to you, even today it's the same. I haven't changed myself on that. I mean I am unable to change. That's such a natural habit of mine only you can understand. Bitter and sweet memories have made me wise. Every decision which I thought I would regret became a learning. The confidence you had then is still the same. You don't fail to attract people even today. I am sure you are so happy to know that I haven't become boring and old people type in all these years. I am living you always inside my heart. 

Bubble, talkative and humorous you. 

Do write to me if you think I am acting too mature and have forgot to live life in amidst of what they call as “Building a life”. 


Love and Nominal regret,
Your orderly you. 

Linking this post with - Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by Blogadda